• H


Updated: Jun 24, 2020

An in-depth reflection, directly from the words of a past play partner of mine.


It has been some time since our encounter in late July. Henry and I have known each other for a time. My schedule as a professional, paired with other life occurrences, caused our paths to diverge for a period of several months. However, in late July there was a change.


Henry and I were in communication with regard to our scheduling; it happened to be that he was scheduled to be in Atlanta. At the prospect, I wanted to ensure that I was able to enjoy the experience that he was set to provide. Such an experience was going to be one for my personal history book; a colorful book mark in a life where sexual and sensual release was a subject of exploration. After some intensive planning and consistent communication over a period of a week, I began to set and plan my tribute that I wished to provide during this period. The clock began to run. As such, the anticipation slowly mounted in my chest for what was to come. The last weekend in July rolled around. It was a standard summer weekend, with the heat in Atlanta building to sweltering ninety (90) plus degrees. The heat also was building in anticipation of Henry’s arrival.


My tribute was set; I procured a hotel of the finest quality in the middle of Midtown. It was central to everything possible and I wanted to ensure that in having this experience, I was able to host this experience in fine quality fashion. Upon his arrival, I procured other items which could be used. I provided a generous length of black cotton rope, which could be used by him later. It was imperative that in my provision of tribute, I provided something that could prove to be useful now and also something that could be useful later.One of my most precious things I can tribute is my time in addition to the tangibles. I am a professional in my waking and non-kink related life who tends to work a 60 to 70-hour work week. For Henry, I blocked out two whole days from my schedule to be able to enjoy his presence, negotiate, and share enlightening conversations about kink, bondage, and BDSM. The preceding time before we engaged in any play was just as stimulating mentally as what was to come physically.


On that Sunday morning, the sun was rising on the bay windows of the 7th floor suite. In Atlanta, there are not many buildings that obstruct views to the east or west, so we had the full amber of the sun... it was pouring upon us. As the light poured in, so did new sensations. In that moment, the tightly wound exterior that I hold slowly unwound. What is normally naturally dominant became consciously demure; I submitted. I knew I submitted when I was on my knees, stomach down and face down with my hand outstretched in open. I appeared to be bowing down. My intention was to have Henry sense my willingness to submit, not just from my prior tributes, but from the present vulnerable state I allowed myself to be in.

As the wax dripped upon my back, I felt the tension of being in control of myself vacate my body. It was surreal. For the first time in my life, I let myself become primal. The second part of the scene came with bondage being added to my present submission. As leather restraints began to bind me, I felt the tension in my body transfer even further outwards. With each new restraint, I felt myself slowly dipping myself into a place of unknown bliss. As my chest and legs became bound, I felt my excitement [along with other aspects of my anatomy] rise. My mouth became agape with breaths escaping in preliminary ecstasy. When the first drops of wax landed on my nipples, it caused pleasurable sound to travel from my chest. I felt myself drifting on the pleasure provided by the sensations of the hot wax as the leather restraints pressed against my skin.

There were other marvelous sensations that peaked my excitement. The Wartenberg Wheel (or as some call it a pin-wheel) traveled across my body. With me being blindfolded, the intensity of it seemingly doubled. I felt myself ready to stir, but could not. It aroused me because I was now subject to the terms and conditions of the pleasurable sensations and I, in my submission, had to ride the wave. I felt myself grow increasingly aroused and at that time felt my breathing deepening. I felt like I was willing and ready to submit to any sensations provided by Henry. Now; I had reached sub-space.

The pose had changed some; rather than being on the bed, I was now to submit standing up in the window – bound, collared, and all. I had never done exhibitionism. Yet in the more advanced light of the morning, there I was. It gave me a rush, I have never felt before. I was now bound with lace adornments [which is my favorite material] in addition to the leather [my other favorite material]. The Wartenberg Wheel made another appearance and its spokes traveled along the contours of my body and my member; I exclaimed in sharp sighs and soft moans. I felt myself traveling higher into my ecstasy and lower into my submission.


Upon the near mid-day, our time had reached a close. The session had lasted for several hours. It felt like a blissful and marvelous period of beauty personified by marks left by the restraints. In this moment is when I realized what I was: I am a sexual being who does not only require sex, but sensuality. I was a dominant type-A force, who needed to submit to my natural forces and primal needs. Henry made me realize that tribute is not just about money, it is about quality time and indicating your wiliness to explore the expanses of human intimacy.Upon conclusion of our rendezvous, I remembered I messaged him. I indicated the following: “ Not to make it too grandiose, but our time together made me realize that fear and perceived un-readiness gets in the way. I’ve spent a lot of my life hiding in the back of the room or being quiet. I would never be the one to post videos or pictures of me playing or getting so deeply into enjoying what I like. I used to faint at the idea of me doing exhibitionism. Our experience allowed me to have the tipping point I needed to move on from my old fears and insecurities.” In the end, Henry allowed me to reconcile some ongoing body insecurity issues. He allowed me to understand human intimacy beyond sex. I finally understood the importance of sex work and what it truly does for those who are engaged in its practice. I also came to realize that I do not have to have an un-scalable wall as a personality; I could be professional and welcoming just as he was to me. I was able to discover that I do like bondage on its own and that penetration was not required to bring me to a place of mind-altering pleasure. More profoundly, I realized I could reach orgasm without stimulating my genitals.If anyone has read this entry from beginning to end, I can tell you that Henry is worth your time, worth your tribute, and definitely worth becoming a regular client of. All you have to do is be ready and willing to submit and let go for a few moments.

In Reflection,

S. Alcaeus

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